The past, including one minute ago, already happened and you can’t change it. The future might happen, you can only plan for it. The present, it’s happening! Be the best you in this moment here and now! Don’t blame the past and don’t wait for the future. Be whatever you want to be.
What do you want to be right now?
I know I make it sound too simple and life is a lot more complicated at times. However, sometimes we just need to simplify ourselves.
Story of my journey…living in the present.
A few years ago, I was unhappy and cynical. I hated my dad, hated my job, and judged everything that moved. My marriage was hurting and I just couldn’t get along with anyone. Every time someone mentioned it to me, I brought up the past and how it affected me. I made a lot of excuses on why I can’t be happy. I always had a reason not to do something. I forgot about the important things in life. I had such negative vibes all around me.
I’ve always worked hard, made lots of money, and thought it was going to be better in the future. As I started to believe things couldn’t get worst, my wife dropped a bomb on me. She told me she was falling out of love with me. This was extremely hard to hear, but I listened. She said, “I am losing love for you, and I wanted to be honest.” This shook me to the core, but I listened and I heard.
Long story short, she wanted “us” but not the current unhappy “us”. She didn’t want to wait any longer to be happy.
I love my wife and there is nothing in this world I wouldn’t do for her. So here is what happened. I read books, I listened to podcasts, and took online counseling. They all taught me the same thing! Happiness starts with you, here and now! Not your past, and not your future. If you want to be happy, make it happen! I can’t make anyone else happy until I learned how to be happy myself.
I made that change and it’s been going well. I’ve more recently made a complete change in my life and carried what I’ve learned to all my relationships. I am lucky because I’ve had the best support from family and friends. I’m telling this story because I want those people to know how grateful I am. I’m grateful for their support of my changes. I learned how to just be me and they encouraged it. Not only did they encourage it, they accepted it. It’s made us happier and stronger, and I want to share this with everybody that we love.
The journey was long. It was scary. I was very afraid of being judged, but I always kept the big picture in mind…I NEED US TO BE HAPPY.
If you’re scared, you’re not alone. As long as you’re not hurting others and improving yourself, go for it. People who love you, will support you. People who care, will adjust with you. People that matter will accept you. People that are your friends, will love you (from a distance if necessary). Keep living, keep smiling, be happy.
Again, I don’t want to sound like it is always that simple. We all get tired, sad, angry, etc… Life happens and times aren’t always happy moments. I just want people to know that when those moments pass, move forward. Don’t live in the past, don’t live for the future, live in the present.
Life is for the living, live it happy!
Photography by Henry Bui.